What to gift someone processing loss

06 February 2022

Do you know someone who has recently lost a loved one? Do you want to help support them through this most difficult time? In this article, we will provide you with thoughtful ideas on what to gift someone who is currently mourning the loss of a loved one.

Coping with loss is a challenge that we will all have to face at some point in our lifetime. That does not make it easier or provide us with any comforting thought, but it is the unfortunate truth.

Here is a list of thoughtful gift ideas, to provide love and support in a time when it is most needed and apprectiated.

Flowers or seed packs
Handwritten letters
Condolence Book
Photographs or a Memory Book
Self-care kit
Home cooked meal
Childcare
Your time

Below we have explained why we believe each of these to be humbling gifts to give someone during this time.

Flowers or Flower Seed Pack

Giving flowers to someone who is mourning will brighten their living space and the type of flower can hold wonderful hidden meanings. We offer a great guide on Choosing Funeral Tribute Flowers, in which we explain the meaning behind the most popular choices. You may find this helpful when trying to select the perfect floral arrangement for the bereaved.

However, the only downside to flowers, is they will not long last. Flowers, although very beautiful, will wilt within a week or two. Therefore, why not consider giving the gift of flower seeds as an alternative. We offer personalized forget me not seed packs, which are the perfect gift for those in mourning. The receiver can plant the seeds in memory of their loved one, when the flowering time comes, they will be greeted with beautiful flowers that will remind them of who they were planted in memory of. Not only will the flowers last the season, and look beautiful in the garden, but they will also provide shelter and nutrients to the wildlife, which holds many benefits in itself.

Handwritten letter

Losing a loved one is emotionally and physically draining. The days that surround the funeral are incredibly overwhelming. Mourners will process this time in very different ways, some will find comfort in the company of others, some will busy themselves and some will want space to mourn in solitude. A handwritten letter is a wonderful way to pass on your thoughts and memories, without being intrusive. You may have a memory you wish to share, which will bring comfort to the mourner and will bring happiness, but writing these memories down, will allow them to digest in their own time. A letter is an extremely thoughtful way to approach this sentiment. The family will most likely be bombarded with phone calls and messages following their loss, much of what is relayed to them will probably be lost in a sea of emotion. Whereas a handwritten letter will enable them to digest and revisit your well wishes, when they feel ready and able to.

Condolence Book

If you are a family member or are extremely close to the deceased, then why not consider creating a condolence book. Invite friends and family to add their condolence messages and memories to a book. This will not only be a wonderful keepsake for the family but will provide a channel for family and friends to pass on their condolences, share memories and photographs, whilst giving the family space and time to mourn. How much more thought can go into a gift, than pulling together to give the gift of memories of their loved one, something they can look back on in years to come.

At A Loving Tribute we have recently launched a new mobile phone app to market, to make creating, sharing and managing condolence books even more simple. You can read more about A Loving Tribute Books app here.

Photographs or a photobook

Gifting someone photos of their loved ones, which they do not already possess, is invaluable. It is a gift that money cannot buy. If you have many photos or if you are able to collect more photos from family members and friends, then why not collate into a memory book for the bereaved. The thought and time put into creating this keepsake is priceless and they will treasure the book for a lifetime.

Self-care kit

Make sure they are looking after themselves by gifting them a self-care kit. Self-care kits can consist of anything. Below are a few ideas as to what you can include.

Tissues – to dry their eyes.
A Favourite drink – such as team bags, coffee or hot chocolate sachets.
A Yummy treat – their favourite chocolates, biscuits, or cake.
Fresh Fruit or Vegetables – to ensure they are keeping healthy.
A Mindful Item - something for them to focus on, such as an uplifting book, a puzzle or a colouring book with pens, allowing them to focus on mindful healing.
A Scented Candle – smells can be soothing and help them to relax.
Scented Bath Essentials – lavender is a favourite, to help them sleep and keep rested.

Care packs do not have to be expensive, just from the heart. A gift to let them know you are thinking of them and wish them support through this process.

Home cooked meal

Mourners are more than likely not feeling like cooking after the loss of a loved one. They are also likely to be going through a physically exhausting period of making funeral arrangements and keeping themselves together emotionally, which alone can make them run down. Why not help support them with a nutritious home cooked meal. Taking the time to prepare a balanced meal which is easy for them to reheat will be greatly appreciated during this time.

Childcare

If the mourners have young children, why not offer to look after them. Even just for an hour or two, give the parents that time to themselves, it will be extremely appreciated. The parents can have a rest, take a bath and have time for self-care, which they otherwise would not be focusing on. It can also be beneficial for the children to be away from the mourning for a short period of time. Take them for ice cream, to feed the ducks or just for a walk. Try to keep the children active, to help them sleep easy at nighttime, which will furthermore support the parents with their usual ‘routine’.

Your Time

You can also offer your time as a gift. Offer to help clean the house, wash laundry for the grieving, offer to go food shopping, to take the children to school, or even wash the cars, they are unlikely feeling up to performing these basic tasks and offering your help will be greatly received. Do not feel offended if they reject your offer, for they may have many ‘helping hands’, but too many helping hands offered, are always better than no helping hands at all. If nothing else, they know you were there to help if needed.